Ironically my internet is currently out so I'm uploading this from my telephone. That's irony right? Because we all know what lives on the internet.

crimstmas

I feel like you can get XCOM: Enemy Unknown, with the Enemy Within expansion pack, for like $3 during a Steam sale.

Usually the 'X Simulator' episode title thing I do is a bit tongue-in-cheek, but, like, c'mon.

I did not realize how good I was at foreshadowing until I listened to this again while editing.

Really shoulda played this before the end of December to pad out my 'games launched' stat on the Steam Replay.

loverboy_working_for_the_weekend_mp3.bat

I would make such a good crisis dispatch operator, do you hear how calm under pressure I am? Maybe not the best at, y'know, parsing information or whatever, but that's probably like half as important.

I dunno man, ants? Probably ants. I left the first email in solely to embarrass past me, freakin' dork.

When you sink a series of shots in pool do they call it 'draining your balls?' If so they should cease, posthaste.

The next person that tells me to hurry up is getting a boba straw in the eyeball.

Thank you operators.

"Oh my God! JC! A bomb!" "A bomb!"

*hacker voice* I'm in

Truly one of the greatest boss fights in the canon of video games. Sit down Virgil 3. Go get a snack Giygas. Ornstein and Smough? More like Ornstein and No. I think that rhymes, but I guess I don't really know for sure.

It is a very unique idea to have your jump scare sound be the quietest noise in the video game.

When in doubt, hit 'em where it hurts (genitals).

Iggy's Reckin' Balls alien makes a noise that sounds identical to one of my mouth clicks, but I can assure you with the utmost certainty that it is coming from the game track and not my mic track.Also it has come to my attenti...

It's a fake job simulator and one of them spooky Spot the Difference games, how could I not play this?

Communication is a two-way street. Unfortunately me and Rio are both jaywalking directly in front of traffic.

It is very funny that the solution to the puzzle is found by issuing a command, getting told that your command did nothing to advance the situation, issuing the command again, once again getting told in the exact same way that your command did ...

👅 💪 🦵 🦷 🫀 🧠 🧠 🧠 🦶

Alright, so the volume on the game track ranges from +3.7dB in rooms that don't have extremely loud hums or buzzes or crackles in them (very few), to -10.3dB every time there's a fight. And also for one specific door opening extremely loudly.&n...

 ORDINAL NUMBER->OBJECT->RELATIVE DIRECTION   ORDINAL NUMBER->OBJECT->RELATIVE DIRECTION   ORDINAL NUMBER->OBJECT->RELATIVE DIRECTION  

I would like to take this moment to apologize to Rio for some of the rude things that I have said to her. Not all of them, because c'mon, but at least a couple. Also the word I was thinking of was 'bequeathed.'